Archive | LOLGOP RSS feed for this section

Yes, Ted Cruz IS eligible to be President of the United States — encourage him to run and help end the GOP

By on May 12, 2013 in LOLGOP

Don’t even get any of that birther stink on you

Ted Cruz’s mother was a U.S. citizen when he was born in Calgary. This makes him a “natural born citizen” and eligible to become president of the United States. For this same reason, Barack Obama would be eligible to be president even if he were born abroad — he wasn’t.

“The weight of scholarly legal and historical opinion appears to support the notion that ‘natural born Citizen’ means one who is entitled under the Constitution or laws of the United States to U.S. citizenship ‘at birth’ or ‘by birth,’ including any child born ‘in’ the United States, the children of United States citizens born abroad, and those born abroad of one citizen parents who has met U.S.…


Read full story • Comments { 0 }

America is in an abusive relationship with the House Republicans — and we can get out

By on May 4, 2013 in GOPocrisy, LOLGOP

You’ve probably heard the House Republicans are planning another useless vote to repeal ObamaCare.

This 30-somethingth display of their impotence is the kind of sabre-rattling that appeals to GOP primary voters — the only voters they care about — while wasting our precious time and money as millions of Americans struggle to find work.

Imagine if House Republicans had voted to repeal the PATRIOT ACT 33 times. Liberals would be cheering along the same way they cheered Rand Paul’s drone filibuster — before they found out that Paul was okay with American citizens being droned as long as they committed some atrocity like robbing a liquor store.…


Read full story • Comments { 8 }

Former Tucson, Arizona mayoral candidate raising money to give away free shotguns in high-crime areas

By on March 27, 2013 in Gun Control, LOLGOP

Oh, for the love of Goddess…

If you don’t believe the headline of this post, I really don’t blame you. I myself was skeptical until I clicked the link to the Arizona Daily Star article and was forced to confront the unfortunate fact that there are actually people this stupid, this unbelievably moronic roaming the earth.

But there it was, in black and white: “Ex-Tucson mayoral hopeful McClusky plans free shotguns for high-crime areas”.

All the facepalming details after the jump.


Read full story • Comments { 4 }

Paul Ryan: “We’re not going to give up on destroying the health care system for the American people”

By on March 12, 2013 in Bwahahahahaha, LOLGOP, Paul Ryan

Honesty comes out in the funniest ways sometimes

Paul Ryan explains the goal of the GOP’s new rehashed plan to cure the nation’s fiscal woes earlier today:

“This to us is something that we’re not going to give up on, because we’re not going to give up on destroying the health care system for the American people.”

It’s not that this comes as a surprise or anything, we just never thought you’d be so brazen about it, Mr. Ryan.

To quote a former candidate for president: “Oops”.

Video after the jump.


Read full story • Comments { 0 }
LOLGOP gay choice

Let the states decide if Republicans can marry

By on February 22, 2013 in LOLGOP

Remind me when letting the states decide civil rights issues has ever worked out, again.

When I tell my friends that I support letting the states decide if Republicans can marry, they often ask me to leave their sauna, unfriend them on Facebook and return all of their lent toiletries.

In these instances, I’m reminded that the tradition of marriage is so sacred to many Americans that the notion of Republicans being allowed to marry can offend their very being. “Imagine,” their smoldering eyes seem to be screaming, “My dear, normal child being forced to sit in a classroom being forced to learn about Newt Gingrich’s belief that marriage should only between a man and a woman who doesn’t have cancer.”

I try to tell them that not all Republicans are like Marc Sanford, David Vitter or Herman Cain.…


Read full story • Comments { 9 }

Marco Rubio’s “working class family” home on sale for $675,000 – come see the photos!

By on February 14, 2013 in Bwahahahahaha, Lies, LOLGOP

That’s quite a working class neighborhood you have there, Senator

During his rebuttal to the State of the Union address the other night, in addition to responding to a different SOTU address than the rest of us watched and having the Most Awkward Drink of Water Ever Ever, Marco Rubio talked about living “in the same working class neighborhood” he grew up in.

Our friends at Estately.com who are, apparently, Eclectablog & LOLGOP fans, sent along a link to Senator Rubio’s real estate posting on their site for the house he lives in. His house is for sale and the sales price is a whopping $675,000. It’s a nice house with a swimming pool and everything. But, at a sales price of over two-thirds of a million dollars, it’s clear that Rubio’s neighborhood is hardly “working class”, at least not any longer.

Details and photos after the jump.


Read full story • Comments { 8 }

Ladies and gentlemen: the “Savior of the Republican Party”, Marco Rubio

By on February 12, 2013 in Bwahahahahaha, LOLGOP

Excuse me while I take this drink…

Submitted without comment but with peals of mocking laughter:

Video after the jump.


Read full story • Comments { 2 }

LOLGOP’s SiriusXM interview on Politics Powered By Twitter

By on January 9, 2013 in Interview, LOLGOP

Are you woman? Are you man? We’re your biggest Twittered-up fans

Last night, LOLGOP was on SiriusXM’s Politics Powered By Twitter show. You can listen to it after the jump. If the link doesn’t work for you, hop over to the HyperVocal website where they have transcribed some of the highlights and included their own commentary and impressions after talking to our very own Eclectablogger.

It’s a spectacularly fun interview. Enjoy (after the jump.)


Read full story • Comments { 0 }

Are you enjoying the GOP’s worst rebranding ever?

By on December 26, 2012 in LOLGOP

The current meltdown reminds us that 2010 was a massive fluke that we must avenge

In the summer of 2012, House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi pushed a plan that would extend the Bush tax breaks for all income under $1,000,000.

She did this for one reason: To prove the House GOP would never vote for a tax increase ever, despite never-ending pretense of caring about the deficit.

Cut to the winter 2012, Speaker John Boehner pushes a variation of Pelosi’s plan along with cuts to Social Security and some tax increases on the middle class.

Guess what? He couldn’t get his caucus to vote on it.…


Read full story • Comments { 7 }

4 Reasons the Tea Party Movement Happened and Will Never Happen Again

By on December 1, 2012 in LOLGOP

How the GOP’s rebranding became even less popular than the GOP

If you’re ever feeling masochistic, take a look into the comments of a post on Breitbart.com. You’ll see gems like this one from “Patriot”:

We have quit. Mitt won hands down & we did nothing. Whats left to do? Become a terrorest against our own country?

( “terrorest” must be the superlative form of “terrorist.”)

Fueled by instances of actual black people actually voting in Maine and Mitt receiving zero votes in urban precincts in Cleveland and Philadelphia, Breitbots are questioning the validity of the election. This is despite the fact that in 2012 President Obama won with a higher share of the popular vote of any candidate since 1988—except himself in 2008.…


Read full story • Comments { 8 }
eXTReMe Tracker